The 90's by Sarah

Saving My Romance

January 26, 1992 | Tacoma | Age 14

 

Dear Diary,

Oh, for joy (Ren & Stimpy Show copyright) another pathetic week has come to a close. Yes, I have not written for the past 7 days - I have been so very busy preparing for report cards.I am quite ready for this fresh and long awaited new week: the returning of regular P.E. (with M.S.S.), the ending of earth sci., and the beginning of ART! I am thrilled!

The dance last Fri.? Nothing special - I am saving my romance up for  Valentine's Day dance!

P.S. I look forward to seeing Ian in English, Sam in P.E., Jaime in History and Mark Hist. too.

What a pathetic entry!

Sarah Hoopes

I Speak Candle Flames

January 19, 1992 | Tacoma | Age 14

Dear Diary,

Am I real? Am I true? Am I sane?
I am the true Real. But sane?
I am sister to the moon.
The true believer am I.
I see with my mind.
I see you with my mind.
I have no true fear.
The night is my lover.
My door rarely opens.
I am fixing the hole where the rain gets in,
and stops my mind from wandering.
This is me...
I speak candle flames.
I cry to mirrors.
I dream true dreams.
But sane?

This is me.

Sarah Hoopes

A Tearful Close

Janaury 12, 1992 | Tacoma | Age 14

Dear Diary,

My week of pure blissful and contentful [sic] happiness has come to a tearful close. I now step carefully into my normal life - it is not so bad. The wounds of past still mar my face but I am brave. I somehow feel alone, just slightly bitter. Perhaps a bit of solitude shall do me well. It may be that really I am separate from most ones - I do not mind this. I am content and my duties are ever near: I must support my ones in their pursuit of self-happiness and awareness. Now I march positively to my normal life, I am never afraid.

CONSTANTIA
Sarah Hoopes

 

With All My Heart

January 8, 1992 | Tacoma | Age 14

Dear Diary,

I winked at my little brother tonight and he smiled. With all my heart, I love Quincy. This is my happiness for the day.

Sarah Hoopes

My Fair Skin

January 7, 1992 | Tacoma | Age 14

A Simple Day

I have little time, so I must write fast (I wish to be fully rested tonight so as not to be lazy tomorrow - much work). I regret to say that my B-party (no longer even that) must be post-poned (sp?) - Simone is most disappointed.

My prediction has come true - I am almost certain that Simone disapproves of my staying home. After much consideration, I have come to the decision that my missed days only help make up for the week and 1/2 I spent in pure agony with the pox - on Christmas, too! My face still is covered with frightening holes and scabs - I fear my fair skin may never be the same.

Yours, Sarah

Torment Pure

January 6, 1992 | Tacoma | Age 14

Dear Diary,

All goes well. I spoke with Simone tonight, and we now hunger for each other’s company like the greedy creatures we are.

My mother began Physical Theropy (I know that was sp. way wrong - but one must live with such things - yes?) and I continue to torment her with simple teenage/mother annoyances.

I fear [that because of] my "illness" (I stayed home from school today [since] the last 2 weeks were vacation and chicken pox: torment pure and my mum promised me that she would not make me go to school with my face covered in "war wounds") they (my friends - esp. Sim. who can only miss school due to death-threatening problems) will think I am lazy and simply do not want to go. Not so, my face looks awful, and a dance is coming up. Woe is me!

Sarah Elizabeth Hoopes, Age 14!

Perpetually Thine

January 5, 1992 | Tacoma | Age 14

Dear Diary,

Good day! I am not longer bitter. My current situation is exquisite. I am prepared for the coming week - my room is immaculate, my door mirror is up, my Sark poster (How To Be An Artist) now adorns my wall, we now have a "Mac" LC to keep my father’s IBM company (though "technology tensions" are mounting), and I am not so angry with Simone (we just need some time apart. I hung-up on her today [in a way - just as she was about to say goodbye] and I rather regret it). Happy room, happy mind - yesterday my room was in an awful state, draw your own conclusions.

Indeed, all is looking lovely, may thus continue.

Perpetually thine,
SARAH

Curse Her!

January 4, 1992 | Tacoma | Age 14

Dear Diary,

Warning: READ AT OWN RISK

Tonight I am bitter. My father angers me because of his irritable mood, my mom because she does not try to understand. My brother embitters me because of his damned sensitive state. Bitterness eats away at solemn heart because Ruby really doesn’t think, because Jenny is possessed by jealousy, because Simone went to Teresa’s house today - although we had made plans to get together - without even calling me to inform me of this and now is spending the night there - without even calling beforehand. Curse her!

I spent this morning preparing for her visit and she bloody didn’t give a damn about me until the time suited her - late afternoon - and then she decided to call me and inform. Despite it all, the one who I am most bitter with is my wretched self - why must I get into these states?

SARAH HOOPES

Teresa angers me too. She took Simone, among other numerous things.

If Mirrors Could Speak

January 3, 1992 | Tacoma | Age 14

Good night, my friends! If mirrors could speak, what wonders would they share? Mysteries solve? Secrets unlock? How my mirrors would sing! How my mirrors would shock the world, move the world, woe the world. But I fear not, my dears can be trusted. Such a friend could not compare with my looking glass chums, who listen so intently to your wishes, your desires, your loves, your secrets. Though never do they - oh no, not mine, not mine. Or do they, could it be? Ask them my friends, slip into their looking glass world - one would find such wonders there.

My mirrors, for Always,
The looking glass child.
S.E. Hoopes